Draft 3

After looking at the results from my focus group test, I looked back at my script and tried to improve it a bit more. The feedback I was given, stated that text message conversations could be included to speed up the pace. So, the conversation between Jen and Eve after the arguement about the trip, I changed to a text message conversation. Either to be shown by crosscutting or down the middle. 

Script for my 6 part series for Media - Episode 1

*All the audience can hear is a scene from a Will Smith movie*

*A phone rings*

Friend on the phone, Megan: Hey, you out tonight?

Jen: No I won't be, Will is on! I can't miss his movie

Megan: Are you kidding me? You promised you'd come out

Jen: Sorry but you know how much I love him, I will not be out tonight

Megan: Get a grip, you've watched all his movies, just come out

Jen: No chance, maybe some other time

Megan: Oh whatever, don't come crawling back to me when you've got nothing better to do than watch Will Smith, *laughs* grow up

*Puts the phone down*

*We see her bedroom, everything is based on Will Smith*

*She carries on watching the film, mother comes in*

Mum: Why aren't you going out now?

Jen: Oh, I can't be bothered now

Mum: You mean because you was arguing with Megan?

Jen: Oh mum, don't you start! I was watching Will

Mum: I'm just saying, don't abandon your friends! You can watch tv anytime 

Jen: Ok, whatever mum

Mum: Now don't be staying up too late, you have college tomorrow and you ARE going! 

Jen: *Sighs* Do I have to? Will is on This Morning and I don't want to miss it, he's talking about his new film

Mum: Jen, you're going. Your education is more important. End of, goodnight.

*Mum leaves*

*Jen sighs, carries on watching Will*

The morning after

*Jen is up and ready, goes down stairs, gets her dinner money and leaves*

Jen: *mimics her mother* Hi is this Mrs Mason?.... Yes, it's Jennifer's mum, I'm just letting you know that Jennifer won't be in until later on, she's at a doctors appointment, thank you, bye

*laughs*

*we see her hidden in a back alley, looking to see when her mother goes*

*after a while, her mother leaves and Jen goes home to watch television*

Scene change

*phone call conversation*

Mum: Hi, is this Mrs Mason?

Mrs Mason: Yes, who's speaking please?

Mum: Its Jennifer's mum, I was just ringing to ask you if she could collect her sisters on the way home, her battery must of died, she isn't replying

Mrs Mason: But, Mrs Reed you just rang to says she's at a doctors appointment?

Mum: I certainly did not. Wait until I see her, I will sort this. Sorry for the inconvenience 

Mrs Mason: Thank you Mrs Reed, see you soon

Scene change

*after college/work, Jen is sat at home 'doing work', parents and siblings come in*

Dad: So, Jen my little angel. How was college?

Jen: Ur, yea it was alright 

Mum: Oh really, what did you do?

Jen: Not alot, just usual

Dad: I bet you're gutted about missing Will

Jen: Yeah, I am cause mum wouldn't let me watch him

Mum: Enough Jen, you missed college and you're in serious trouble 

Jen: What?! No I didn't 

Dad: Jennifer, your mum spoke to Mrs Mason after you rang claiming you was at the doctors! 

Mum: When are you going to listen to us Jennifer? You are missing out on severe amounts of college work, you won't get into University

Dad: Your mum is right Jen, start acting your age

Jen: When are you going to stop treating me like a child?! Leave me alone

*Jen walks out and slams the door*

Mum: Things are going to change around here, I'm sick of her attitude. We do everything for her.

Dad: Your right love 

Scene change

*Jen on the phone to Eve*

Jen: Eve I am so angry

Eve: Why hun? Whats up?

Jen: My mum and dad have hit the roof about me skiving today to watch Will *laughs* they are really doing my head in. They do it whenever I do something to do with someone I am interested in, they just don't care.

Eve: Shit, do you reckon you'll sort it?

Jen: I don't know why?

Eve: I'm not supposed to say but....

Jen: But what?! Tell me

Eve: Well my mum was telling me earlier that college are organising a trip to the premiers of some ace movies for film and media in like 2 weeks! Big stars will be there, maybe Will and everyone else we love but DON'T say a word

Jen: *gasps* OH.MY.GOD are you fucking kidding me?

Eve: NO! How awesome is that? You NEED to sort this out 

*mum shouts*

Mum: Jen, off the phone. Me and your dad wants words!

Jen: *sighs* Ok, Eve I'll ring you later, mother dearest wants me

Eve: Ok babe, let me know what happens, see ya

*Jen goes downstairs*

Jen: What? 

Dad: Me and your mum are really disappointed in you, college is important. SO, from now on, we take you to college then you have NO excuses

Mum: Do you hear?

Jen: YES

Mum: Good and also, we've got you some extra shifts at work, you're not lazying around on your ass anymore, you've got work fridays and saturdays, as well as your days during the week for 3 weeks.

Jen: What?! Mum I have plans! 

Dad: Jennifer, you're doing the shifts. Think of the money love.

Jen: URGH, you are so annoying 

*Jen goes upstairs and sits in her room, she puts on her television and watches a Will Smith movie*

Jen: (too herself) I will do ANYTHING to meet you Will.

Scene change - at college

Eve: Babe, did ya sort it?

Jen: You're kiddin right? It's gonna take longer than a night to sort this, they went sick

Eve: Shit, babe you need to sort it asap! My mums announcing the trip some time this week and needs numbers and money quick time, the trip is only 2 weeks away! 

Jen: Chill, I will! I'll talk to them tonight and blag my way out of it 

Meg: Hm, yea like that will work! You have a lot of grovelling to do Jen

Jen: Tell me about it! I'll sort something, hopefully, I can't miss Will

Meg: Yeah but Jen, you need to think beyond that! It isn't all about Will, you've seriously pissed them off this time

Jen: (laughs) Ok ok, I will sort it and apologise, they'll be cool

Eve: Ok babe, well give us a ring later and let us know what happens. Gotta get to Drama! If I'm late again I get put on report! 

Jen: Yeah I get one too if I miss one more performing arts! I'll ring you later anyway cause I finish at dinner

Eve and Meg: Ok hun

Scene change

*Jen is at home, cooking and cleaning the house ready for when her mum and dad come home. The table is set, the meal is out and the house is spotless.*

*Jen's dad walks in*

Dad: Wow, have you done this?

Jen: Yes, all of it. I need to apologise for my behaviour and wanted to make it up to you and mum

Dad: Jennifer, I appreciate the gesture but it isn't going to sort everything out! You skived college

Jen: I know, I know and I won't again, I promise. Please just sit down and we can talk

Dad: I'll happily sit down and eat this meal but I don't know what else there is to say and I'm sure mum will agree

*Jens mum walks in*

Mum: Erm, what is this?

Dad: Jen has cooked us a meal to say sorry 

Mum: I hope you didn't take the day off college to tidy up and do this Jen! 

Jen: Mum I haven't! You know I finish at 12 on Monday's

Mum: Hmmm yeah it's alright for some! So come on, what have you made us?!

Jen: Well, madam for starters there is prawn cocktail! 

Dad: Awesome, what about main?!

Jen: Rib-eye steak with vegetables, chips or potatoes. Medium to well done for you madam and well done for you sir.

Mum: (laughs) How have you paid for this?

Jen: Had some spare money left so I thought I'd do it proper

Dad: Nice one, desert?

Jen: Well, I tried making a cake but it failed miserably soooo, you have 3 flavours of ice cream to choose from! 

Dad: (laughs) Brilliant.

*Jen serves the starter*

Jen: Tuck in! 

Mum: Thank you love

Dad: Yeah, thank you munchkin

Jen: You're welcome 

Mum: Babe this is delicious 

Dad: Fab, should start telling you off more often

Jen: (laughs) Please don't

Mum: Behave then, you know we only do it because we care 

Jen: I know you do. Are you ready for your mains?

Dad: Ur, yeah go on love

*Jen serves the mains*

Jen: Bon appetite! 

Mum: Oooo fabulous! Thank you

Dad: Mmmm, this is fantastic Jen. I had no idea you could cook this good! 

Jen: Neither did I! Enjoy and I'll be right back

Mum: Where are you going?

Jen: Just to the loo momma

Mum: Ok 

*Jen runs upstairs and rings Eve*

Eve: Hey

Jen: Mission is underway! 

Eve: Come again?

Jen: I cooked them a meal, tidied the house and they love it! 

Eve: God, you're kean. What they saying?

Jen: Had to be done. Just being nice, not asked them about the trip though yet. 

Eve: Yeah, wait abit first but make sure you ask! Then let me know because I'll get my mum to put you on the list. The opportunity goes to the ones who sign up first! There's only like 20 places.

Jen: Ahhhh, wicked! Yeah I will ring you later. Gotta go and serve them (laughs)

Eve: Good luck. Bye babe.

*Jen's parents are talking in the kitchen*

Dad: This is delicious! 

Mum: I agree but she's up to something.

Dad: What do you mean?

Mum: She's after something, she's just buttering us up.

Dad: Oh Tina, give her a break. She might be genuinely sorry. She's trying. It's more than what she's ever done before.

Mum: Maybe so but i'm telling you she's got some trick up her sleeve.

*Jen enters*

Jen: You ready for desert?

Dad: Mm please love 

*Jen prepares the deserts, serves it*

Jen: So can we talk?

Mum: Here we go, I told you Matthew

Jen: Mum! Just hear me out

Dad: Go on, what do you have to say?

Jen: I am genuinely sorry, I really am and I won't skive again or disapoint you both again

Mum: But....

Jen: BUT, there's a college trip to go to some new movie premiers in less than two weeks and I really want to go!

Mum: What's so important about it?

Dad: Tina, she does film and media studies. It is kinda relevant for her.

Mum: There's been loads of trips that she's not been on for film and media. Why this one?! You missed the others because there was exclusive documentaries on Will and whatever else.... Hold on, is Will at this premiere? 

Jen: Maybe

Mum: I knew this was too good to be true. Jen, when are you going to start putting your education first and stop focusing on irrelevant things?

Jen: I'm not!

Dad: It is still a trip though Tina

Mum: Matthew, you're not helping 

Dad: Tina, calm down. When is it Jen?

Jen: less than two weeks away, in London

Mum: You're working all next week and the week after, we got you extra hours!

Dad: Oh yeah, we did 

Jen: Oh please, I am begging.

Mum: Sorry Jen, no. You need to learn your lesson and your working.

Jen: Oh mum please! Dad tell her

Mum: Jen, I said no! 

Dad: Sorry love, your mum said no

Jen: URGHHHH

*Jen stomps off*

Mum: What did I tell you Matt? She wanted something!

Dad: I know but she probably is sorry

Mum: Oh, you're too soft with her you are!

Cross cut 

*Jen is sat in her room thinking to herself, TEXT MESSAGES Eve back*

Eve: Hey, how did it go? X

Jen: Awesome. They totally bought it. I'm coming! X

Eve: YESSSS, ahhh I cannot wait. I will tell my mum. So glad you managed to sort it! Your mum and dad are mint xo

Jen: Ahhh aren't they! Hahaha x

Eve: Too right! Theres no way my mum would of let me off x

Jen: HA well ya know, I just worked my magic. Tell your mum! Will, I'm coming for ya baby

Eve: Haha! Too right you are! Yeah, I will and I'll tell her your paying the fee off monthly. I'll tell meg and the girls the good news too. 

Jen: Ok babe,nice one! See ya tomorrow 

Eve: Night babe. x

*Jen rings her boss*

Colin: Hello

Jen: Hi Col, it's Jen

Colin: Hello love, you alright?

Jen: Yea, I'm fine thank you. Just wanted to ring and see if I could get the week after next off?

Colin: But your mum rang up for extra shifts that week?

Jen: I know but she forgot that I was away that week with college

Colin: Oh god, whats she like. Ok love, I'll sort it. See you Friday! It'll be busy.

Jen: Thank you! Oh great, see you Friday. Bye!

Report on Focus Group Test

To establish any faults with my draft of the first episode, I asked five people of different ages to answer the following 6 questions:

[1] Is the storyline of my drama clear?

[2] Are you aware of who the characters are? Their relevance? 

[3] Is the storyline interesting, what could I include to make it more interesting?

[4] Is it intriguing you?

[5] Is their way of communicating with each other ok?

[6] What is the time pace like?

I asked, my friend Bec (aged 17), my mum (aged 35), my sister (aged 10), my stepbrother (aged 19) and my grandma (aged 59).

-Bec's answers:

Is the storyline of my drama clear?

''Your storyline is clear, it just seems to drag on. It should be more interesting and have a catch to it or something.''

Are you aware of who the characters are? Their relevance?

''Yes, I think so. The characters introduced in this first episode seem pretty simple characters, not complicated at all.''

 Is the storyline interesting, what could I include to make it more interesting?

''It could be more interesting but I prefer comedies. It reminds me of you and when we discuss things like this, it's funny. Maybe you could include conversations we've had so I can laugh!''

Is it intriguing you?

''Kind of because it's typical teenage stuff.'' 

Is their way of communicating with each other ok?

''Yeah but it just seems to be over the phone or in person. Teens use social network sites nowadays and mostly text messages too so maybe include that.'' 

What is the time pace like?

''By reading it, it does seem to drag abit. So by adding the text messages in, it might speed that certain part of your piece up''.

-My mums answers

Is the storyline of my drama clear?

''Yeah, it's the story of my life.''

Are you aware of who the characters are? Their relevance? 

''They are just basic characters''

Is the storyline interesting, what could I include to make it more interesting?

''It might be for teenagers but I wouldn't watch it because it's teenage drama and I have enough of that home. You could include abit more humour, but still, I don't think it will reach to a elder audience.''

Is it intriguing you?

''No because it isn't my kind of programme''

Is their way of communicating with each other ok?

''I'd say so yes''

What is the time pace like?

''By reading it, it's hard to tell what it would be like on television but it did take a bit to read and understand.''

-My sisters answers

Is the storyline of my drama clear?

''Yes, a person wants to do anything to meet a celebrity. It sounds like you.''

Are you aware of who the characters are? Their relevance? 

''Yes they are just normal people''

Is the storyline interesting, what could I include to make it more interesting?

''I don't know''

Is it intriguing you?

''I would watch it''

Is their way of communicating with each other ok?

N/A

What is the time pace like?

''It might drag a bit''

-My stepbrothers answers

Is the storyline of my drama clear?

''Yes but it doesn't sound like something I would watch''

Are you aware of who the characters are? Their relevance? 

''Err, yeah''

Is the storyline interesting, what could I include to make it more interesting?

''Not to me no, it isn't my type of genre. I like comedies and action programmes/films, so all I could say to include is comedy and action but I don't see where you could it include it''

Is it intriguing you?

''No''

Is their way of communicating with each other ok?

''I suppose so''

What is the time pace like?

''Sounds like the scenes would drag on abit''

-My grandma's answers

Is the storyline of my drama clear?

''It just sounds like you, but yes it is clear''

Are you aware of who the characters are? Their relevance? 

''I think so''

Is the storyline interesting, what could I include to make it more interesting?

''It's ok, maybe you could include other conventions to reach out to a wider audience, like comedy or something''

Is it intriguing you?

''Not necessarily, it isn't my kind of programme''

Is their way of communicating with each other ok?

''Yes, I wouldn't follow text messages and social networks''

What is the time pace like?

''Ok, I guess''

By asking these questions, I have established that my storyline makes sense, the characters roles are clear but to make it more interesting more things, such as humour needs to be included. However, it doesn't intrigue a variety of ages, it tends to intrigue children and teens, but my 19 year old brother wasn't interested. The time pace could be speeded up and text message conversations could be included to do so rather than face to face conversations. 

Focus Group Test

To establish any faults or errors within my drama, I have to create at least 5 questions to give to at least 5 different people, allow them to read my script and recieve their feedback for it, ideally my weaknesses in order to improve and ways that I can improve to make it more successful and entertaining.

These are the questions that I asked:

[1] Is the storyline of my drama clear?

[2] Are you aware of who the characters are? Their relevance? 

[3] Is the storyline interesting?

[4] What can I include to make it more interesting?

[5] Is it intriguing you?

[6] Is their way of communicating with each other ok?

Script - Episode 1 - Draft 2

Script for my 6 part series for Media - Episode 1

*All the audience can hear is a scene from a Will Smith movie*

*A phone rings*

Friend on the phone, Megan: Hey, you out tonight?

Jen: No I won't be, Will is on! I can't miss his movie

Megan: Are you kidding me? You promised you'd come out

Jen: Sorry but you know how much I love him, I will not be out tonight

Megan: Get a grip, you've watched all his movies, just come out

Jen: No chance, maybe some other time

Megan: Oh whatever, don't come crawling back to me when you've got nothing better to do than watch Will Smith, *laughs* grow up

*Puts the phone down*

*We see her bedroom, everything is based on Will Smith*

*She carries on watching the film, mother comes in*

Mum: Why aren't you going out now?

Jen: Oh, I can't be bothered now

Mum: You mean because you was arguing with Megan?

Jen: Oh mum, don't you start! I was watching Will

Mum: I'm just saying, don't abandon your friends! You can watch tv anytime 

Jen: Ok, whatever mum

Mum: Now don't be staying up too late, you have college tomorrow and you ARE going! 

Jen: *Sighs* Do I have to? Will is on This Morning and I don't want to miss it, he's talking about his new film

Mum: Jen, you're going. Your education is more important. End of, goodnight.

*Mum leaves*

*Jen sighs, carries on watching Will*

The morning after

*Jen is up and ready, goes down stairs, gets her dinner money and leaves*

Jen: *mimics her mother* Hi is this Mrs Mason?.... Yes, it's Jennifer's mum, I'm just letting you know that Jennifer won't be in until later on, she's at a doctors appointment, thank you, bye

*laughs*

*we see her hidden in a back alley, looking to see when her mother goes*

*after a while, her mother leaves and Jen goes home to watch television*

Scene change

*phone call conversation*

Mum: Hi, is this Mrs Mason?

Mrs Mason: Yes, who's speaking please?

Mum: Its Jennifer's mum, I was just ringing to ask you if she could collect her sisters on the way home, her battery must of died, she isn't replying

Mrs Mason: But, Mrs Reed you just rang to says she's at a doctors appointment?

Mum: I certainly did not. Wait until I see her, I will sort this. Sorry for the inconvenience 

Mrs Mason: Thank you Mrs Reed, see you soon

Scene change

*after college/work, Jen is sat at home 'doing work', parents and siblings come in*

Dad: So, Jen my little angel. How was college?

Jen: Ur, yea it was alright 

Mum: Oh really, what did you do?

Jen: Not alot, just usual

Dad: I bet you're gutted about missing Will

Jen: Yeah, I am cause mum wouldn't let me watch him

Mum: Enough Jen, you missed college and you're in serious trouble 

Jen: What?! No I didn't 

Dad: Jennifer, your mum spoke to Mrs Mason after you rang claiming you was at the doctors! 

Mum: When are you going to listen to us Jennifer? You are missing out on severe amounts of college work, you won't get into University

Dad: Your mum is right Jen, start acting your age

Jen: When are you going to stop treating me like a child?! Leave me alone

*Jen walks out and slams the door*

Mum: Things are going to change around here, I'm sick of her attitude. We do everything for her.

Dad: Your right love 

Scene change

*Jen on the phone to Eve*

Jen: Eve I am so angry

Eve: Why hun? Whats up?

Jen: My mum and dad have hit the roof about me skiving today to watch Will *laughs* they are really doing my head in. They do it whenever I do something to do with someone I am interested in, they just don't care.

Eve: Shit, do you reckon you'll sort it?

Jen: I don't know why?

Eve: I'm not supposed to say but....

Jen: But what?! Tell me

Eve: Well my mum was telling me earlier that college are organising a trip to the premiers of some ace movies for film and media in like 2 weeks! Big stars will be there, maybe Will and everyone else we love but DON'T say a word

Jen: *gasps* OH.MY.GOD are you fucking kidding me?

Eve: NO! How awesome is that? You NEED to sort this out 

*mum shouts*

Mum: Jen, off the phone. Me and your dad wants words!

Jen: *sighs* Ok, Eve I'll ring you later, mother dearest wants me

Eve: Ok babe, let me know what happens, see ya

*Jen goes downstairs*

Jen: What? 

Dad: Me and your mum are really disappointed in you, college is important. SO, from now on, we take you to college then you have NO excuses

Mum: Do you hear?

Jen: YES

Mum: Good and also, we've got you some extra shifts at work, you're not lazying around on your ass anymore, you've got work fridays and saturdays, as well as your days during the week for 3 weeks.

Jen: What?! Mum I have plans! 

Dad: Jennifer, you're doing the shifts. Think of the money love.

Jen: URGH, you are so annoying 

*Jen goes upstairs and sits in her room, she puts on her television and watches a Will Smith movie*

Jen: (too herself) I will do ANYTHING to meet you Will.

Scene change - at college

Eve: Babe, did ya sort it?
Jen: You're kiddin right? It's gonna take longer than a night to sort this, they went sick
Eve: Shit, babe you need to sort it asap! My mums announcing the trip some time this week and needs numbers and money quick time, the trip is only 2 weeks away! 
Jen: Chill, I will! I'll talk to them tonight and blag my way out of it 
Meg: Hm, yea like that will work! You have a lot of grovelling to do Jen
Jen: Tell me about it! I'll sort something, hopefully, I can't miss Will
Meg: Yeah but Jen, you need to think beyond that! It isn't all about Will, you've seriously pissed them off this time
Jen: (laughs) Ok ok, I will sort it and apologise, they'll be cool
Eve: Ok babe, well give us a ring later and let us know what happens. Gotta get to Drama! If I'm late again I get put on report! 
Jen: Yeah I get one too if I miss one more performing arts! I'll ring you later anyway cause I finish at dinner
Eve and Meg: Ok hun

Scene change

*Jen is at home, cooking and cleaning the house ready for when her mum and dad come home. The table is set, the meal is out and the house is spotless.*

*Jen's dad walks in*

Dad: Wow, have you done this?
Jen: Yes, all of it. I need to apologise for my behaviour and wanted to make it up to you and mum
Dad: Jennifer, I appreciate the gesture but it isn't going to sort everything out! You skived college
Jen: I know, I know and I won't again, I promise. Please just sit down and we can talk
Dad: I'll happily sit down and eat this meal but I don't know what else there is to say and I'm sure mum will agree

*Jens mum walks in*

Mum: Erm, what is this?
Dad: Jen has cooked us a meal to say sorry 
Mum: I hope you didn't take the day off college to tidy up and do this Jen! 
Jen: Mum I haven't! You know I finish at 12 on Monday's
Mum: Hmmm yeah it's alright for some! So come on, what have you made us?!
Jen: Well, madam for starters there is prawn cocktail! 
Dad: Awesome, what about main?!
Jen: Rib-eye steak with vegetables, chips or potatoes. Medium to well done for you madam and well done for you sir.
Mum: (laughs) How have you paid for this?
Jen: Had some spare money left so I thought I'd do it proper
Dad: Nice one, desert?
Jen: Well, I tried making a cake but it failed miserably soooo, you have 3 flavours of ice cream to choose from! 
Dad: (laughs) Brilliant.

*Jen serves the starter*

Jen: Tuck in! 
Mum: Thank you love
Dad: Yeah, thank you munchkin
Jen: You're welcome 
Mum: Babe this is delicious 
Dad: Fab, should start telling you off more often
Jen: (laughs) Please don't
Mum: Behave then, you know we only do it because we care 
Jen: I know you do. Are you ready for your mains?
Dad: Ur, yeah go on love

*Jen serves the mains*

Jen: Bon appetite! 
Mum: Oooo fabulous! Thank you
Dad: Mmmm, this is fantastic Jen. I had no idea you could cook this good! 
Jen: Neither did I! Enjoy and I'll be right back
Mum: Where are you going?
Jen: Just to the loo momma
Mum: Ok 

*Jen runs upstairs and rings Eve*

Eve: Hey
Jen: Mission is underway! 
Eve: Come again?
Jen: I cooked them a meal, tidied the house and they love it! 
Eve: God, you're kean. What they saying?
Jen: Had to be done. Just being nice, not asked them about the trip though yet. 
Eve: Yeah, wait abit first but make sure you ask! Then let me know because I'll get my mum to put you on the list. The opportunity goes to the ones who sign up first! There's only like 20 places.
Jen: Ahhhh, wicked! Yeah I will ring you later. Gotta go and serve them (laughs)
Eve: Good luck. Bye babe.

*Jen's parents are talking in the kitchen*

Dad: This is delicious! 
Mum: I agree but she's up to something.
Dad: What do you mean?
Mum: She's after something, she's just buttering us up.
Dad: Oh Tina, give her a break. She might be genuinely sorry. She's trying. It's more than what she's ever done before.
Mum: Maybe so but i'm telling you she's got some trick up her sleeve.

*Jen enters*

Jen: You ready for desert?
Dad: Mm please love 

*Jen prepares the deserts, serves it*

Jen: So can we talk?
Mum: Here we go, I told you Matthew
Jen: Mum! Just hear me out
Dad: Go on, what do you have to say?
Jen: I am genuinely sorry, I really am and I won't skive again or disapoint you both again
Mum: But....
Jen: BUT, there's a college trip to go to some new movie premiers in less than two weeks and I really want to go!
Mum: What's so important about it?
Dad: Tina, she does film and media studies. It is kinda relevant for her.
Mum: There's been loads of trips that she's not been on for film and media. Why this one?! You missed the others because there was exclusive documentaries on Will and whatever else.... Hold on, is Will at this premiere? 
Jen: Maybe
Mum: I knew this was too good to be true. Jen, when are you going to start putting your education first and stop focusing on irrelevant things?
Jen: I'm not!
Dad: It is still a trip though Tina
Mum: Matthew, you're not helping 
Dad: Tina, calm down. When is it Jen?
Jen: less than two weeks away, in London
Mum: You're working all next week and the week after, we got you extra hours!
Dad: Oh yeah, we did 
Jen: Oh please, I am begging.
Mum: Sorry Jen, no. You need to learn your lesson and your working.
Jen: Oh mum please! Dad tell her
Mum: Jen, I said no! 
Dad: Sorry love, your mum said no
Jen: URGHHHH

*Jen stomps off*

Mum: What did I tell you Matt? She wanted something!
Dad: I know but she probably is sorry
Mum: Oh, you're too soft with her you are!

Scene change

*Jen is sat in her room thinking to herself, rings Eve*

Eve: Hey, how did it go?
Jen: Awesome. They totally bought it. I'm coming!
Eve: YESSSS, ahhh I cannot wait. I will tell my mum. So glad you managed to sort it! Your mum and dad are mint 
Jen: Ahhh aren't they! 
Eve: Too right! Theres no way my mum would of let me off
Jen: (laughs) well ya know, I just worked my magic. Tell your mum! Will, I'm coming for ya baby
Eve: (laughs) Too right you are! Yeah, I will and I'll tell her your paying the fee off monthly. I'll tell meg and the girls the good news too. 
Jen: Ok babe,nice one! See ya tomorrow 
Eve: Bye hun.

*Jen rings her boss*

Colin: Hello
Jen: Hi Col, it's Jen
Colin: Hello love, you alright?
Jen: Yea, I'm fine thank you. Just wanted to ring and see if I could get the week after next off?
Colin: But your mum rang up for extra shifts that week?
Jen: I know but she forgot that I was away that week with college
Colin: Oh god, whats she like. Ok love, I'll sort it. See you Friday! It'll be busy.
Jen: Thank you! Oh great, see you Friday. Bye!

The Context of 2 Drama Programmes

FRIENDS

Approximately 1 hour long

Monica and Chandler's wedding (part one)

The one after I do (part two)

Part one 

Story lines

1. The main story line - The Wedding

2. Joey's new acting job

3. Chandler's situation with his parents

4. The Wedding Meal, peoples views etc

5. Ross being a typical big brother 

6. Rachel in charge = goes wrong

7. Chandler panicking 

8. Chandler disappearing and everyone searching for him

9. Joey working on the day of the wedding

10. Finding out about ''Monica's pregnancy''

11.  Everyone distracting Monica

12. Finding Chandler, getting him ready for the ceremony and calming him down but loosing and finding him again - he thinks Monica is pregnant and panics again

13. He comes to terms with it and mans up 

14. Joey isn't there - need a new minister

15. Ceremony begins - Joey returns

16. Find out Monica isn't pregnant - close up on Rachel - is she pregnant?

Left on a cliff hanger 

Scene changes

In part one I counted a number of 25 scene changes.

Part two

1. Phoebe lying about her being pregnant, everyone believing her

2. Ross meets Mona

3. Chandler meets his new 'stepdad'

4. Ross' table 

5. Monica finds out Rachel is pregnant 

6. Ross impressing Mona

7. Joey trying to impress Chandler's stepdad so he can get a job

8. Results of pregnancy = positive

Left on cliff hanger

Scene changes

In part two, there was only 5 scene changes. Most of this part was set in the after party venue of the wedding.

Characters

6 best friends, the main characters of the sitcom

Rachel, Ross, Phoebe, Joey, Monica and Chandler

Then the extras, their families, guests at the wedding, colleagues 

The use of scenery 

-The coffee house, which is used to all meet up (everyday) and talk 

-Monica's house for privacy/conversations

-Restaurant the night before the wedding to gather important people

-Bathroom to get some privacy

-Streets, day to day life

-Hotel room, getting ready

-Ceremony, the wedding

-Bathroom of the venue for the pregnancy test 

How they interact 

In person at the coffee shops, houses, work, the do, the wedding, in streets (usual day to day life) 

In groups

One to one

HOLLYOAKS

Approximately 45/50 minutes long

Part one

Story lines

1. Jacqui's distress from husband (Rhys) death and finding out about the affair 

2. Reactions to the coach accident on the day of Tony & Cindy's and Ste's & Doug's wedding day resulting in deaths and etc

3. Dodger wanting to know who his real dad is but not wanting to hurt the man who raised him

4. Ally wanting to take Ash to Australia, her not wanting to leave her siblings for Christmas

5. Ste's critical condition after the accident and Doug having to inform Ste's children

6. Phoebe burning Rhys' belongings, Jacqui mad

7. Conflict between Lacey and her mum, then begin to bond and talk about boys. Lacey's interest in Ally (her sisters boyfriend) but not referring to him.

8. Jacqui finds out her mum knew about Rhys' affair, even more mad

9. Ally offers to take whole family away

10. Ste wakes up

Scene changes

In the first part I counted 29 scene changes.

Part two

1. Ste starting to recover 

2. Jacqui handling her problems with alcohol = all goes wrong

3. Dodger can't decide whether to meet his dad - talks to Darren

4. Jacqui steals beer from Frankie's shop, Frankie rings the police

5. Lacey wants Ally's attention

6. Darren takes Dodger to see his dad

7. Brendan's feelings for Ste

8. Ste's feelings for Brendan?

9. Dodger's dad shutting door on him

Scene changes

In the second part, I counted 25 scene changes.

Characters

Doug and Ste (married couple) and Ste's 2 children

Dodger and the man who brought him up and his other children

Ash, Callam and Lacey (siblings), their mum Martha

Ally, Ash's boyfriend and Lacey's crush

Jacqui, (widow to Rhys)

Myra, Jacqui's mother

Phoebe, Jacqui's adopted daughter 

Frankie 

Darren

Bart, Jacqui's cousin and Myra's nephew 

Brendan, Ste's ex and Cheryl - Ste's bestfriend/Brendan's sister

Tony, Jacqui's ex and the husband to Cindy who had an affair with Rhys

Dodgers real family

Police 

Use of scenary

Shops, cafe's etc (usual everyday life) to socialize 

''Quite village''

How the interact 

Via phone calls, text messages, social network sites

In person when they meet up

In their homes

Generic Conventions of two script examples

I had to read and compare two script examples to establish how they are developing and becoming a successful storyline.

I read the scrips to an episode of the American Sitcom, Friends and an English, reality/drama, Eastenders.

Link for Friends script: http://www.friendstranscripts.tk/
Link for Eastenders script: http://downloads.bbc.co.uk/writersroom/scripts/eastenders_872.pdf

Similarities

Both scripts include stage directions that are within brackets so that they aren't mistaken for monologues.

When a new scene is about to begin, it says ''CUT TO'' or ''CONVERT TO'' to make it clear that a new scene/setting is going to take place.

They are both clearly set in a realistic environment.

Both programmes last up to approximately half an hour.


Differences

The script for Eastenders is all in capital, big font where as the script for Friends is in a lower case and a smaller font.

In Eastenders there is a number of 20+ characters, in each scene there is an average of 3/4 people communicating either via phones or in person. Where as, in Friends there is about 11 characters, 6 of them being the main characters of the sitcom. In each scene within this episode, atleast 2/3 of the main characters participate in it and again, they communicate via telephones and in person.

The script for Friends states when the opening/finishing credits will take place.